Getting My Ass Kicked
My buddy JC has been trying to talk me into joining his Karate gym since forever now, and I think we're actually going tonight. I'm scared because:
a) I've never done anything even remotely close to this before.
b) Brian will be going also, and he has a 2nd degree black belt.
c) JC is two levels away from black belt...whatever the hell color that is, I think fushia for him.
d) I've spent the last five years tormenting and mocking JC every opportunity I've had.
Yes, even though JC is pretty much second in charge my studio I don't hold my tongue around him. In fact, when he came by to ask me about going to the gym, I told that bitch to leave me alone. One of my teammate said, "Wait, did you just call JC a bitch?" I often forget that people actually show him respect around the office, "Yes, Kelsey, why are you so damn shocked, I call everyone a bitch, in fact, I think you're a bitch too." I keep expecting they'll fire me... what, I only have two swimsuit calendars and a Playboy poster up in my cube wall. Nah, they love me...it's only awkward when they have clients around. But it's not like I haven't gotten at least two clients so drunk they almost missed their flights and called at least one of them a "God damned fucking pussy!" (He deserved it, you had to be there.) Oh, and another one puked all over his hotel room. Hey, I'm just the programmer here, it's not my job to look couth nor take good care of the client's ego.
JC told me he looks forward to kicking my ass for real. I told him I'll tell the Sensei if he does. He said, "Oh, that's okay, because he normally kicks my ass anyhow." Hmmm, is this possible? Will I actually lose a fight with JC? Oooh, this could be a sign of the apocalypse, I don't lose fights.
a) I've never done anything even remotely close to this before.
b) Brian will be going also, and he has a 2nd degree black belt.
c) JC is two levels away from black belt...whatever the hell color that is, I think fushia for him.
d) I've spent the last five years tormenting and mocking JC every opportunity I've had.
Yes, even though JC is pretty much second in charge my studio I don't hold my tongue around him. In fact, when he came by to ask me about going to the gym, I told that bitch to leave me alone. One of my teammate said, "Wait, did you just call JC a bitch?" I often forget that people actually show him respect around the office, "Yes, Kelsey, why are you so damn shocked, I call everyone a bitch, in fact, I think you're a bitch too." I keep expecting they'll fire me... what, I only have two swimsuit calendars and a Playboy poster up in my cube wall. Nah, they love me...it's only awkward when they have clients around. But it's not like I haven't gotten at least two clients so drunk they almost missed their flights and called at least one of them a "God damned fucking pussy!" (He deserved it, you had to be there.) Oh, and another one puked all over his hotel room. Hey, I'm just the programmer here, it's not my job to look couth nor take good care of the client's ego.
JC told me he looks forward to kicking my ass for real. I told him I'll tell the Sensei if he does. He said, "Oh, that's okay, because he normally kicks my ass anyhow." Hmmm, is this possible? Will I actually lose a fight with JC? Oooh, this could be a sign of the apocalypse, I don't lose fights.
posted by SteakGirl at 7:45 AM
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